Dangers of Parasocial Relationships in Social Media
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In November 2022, a teenage actor named Kit Connor was forced to come out as bisexual after being accused of “queerbaiting.” This refers to the intentional act of making oneself appear as a member of the LGBTQ+ community, in order to gain publicity (Saunders, 2022). After Connor, who plays a bisexual rugby player on the popular Netflix show Heartstopper, was spotted holding hands with an actress, his social media was bombarded with vile and hateful messages from “fans” who believed that Connor owed it to them to reveal his sexuality. Despite Heartstopper being centered around the danger of pressuring others to come out, this online harassment continued until Connor outed himself in an attempt to take control over the situation. While his admission was met with overwhelming support from the cast and audience, his situation is indicative of the parasocial relationships fans are increasingly fostering with celebrities, which are harmful to both parties, especially due to rampant usage of social media.
Parasocial relationships occur when a follower develops an intense attachment to a famous figure, viewing them as an actual friend or romantic partner. According to Dr. Kumju Hwang, a professor of Business Administration at Chung-Ang University, this tends to happen with individuals who compensate for low self-esteem by building narratives that allow them to “avoid real rejection” and find a “comfortable path to interact with others.” By entering into a relationship in which they themselves won’t be perceived, people can “compensate for their deficiency in social acceptance,” made even easier by the onset of social media (Hwang and Zhang, 2018). With apps like Instagram and X providing a platform for celebrities to share posts directly to their fans, professors concluded that these sites have “reduced the distance between the fans and celebrities,” a direct contrast to when interactions with celebrities were “rare and carefully controlled for publicity and promotion purposes” (Parmar and Mann, 2021; Chung and Cho, 2017). Fans can keep up with the celebrity’s daily thoughts and activities in real time. While this allows fans to take a closer look into the celebrity’s life, it also resembles the relationship between two friends, and increases the likelihood of one believing that this is a personal message from the celebrity, even though the celebrity is addressing a broad audience.
Celebrities, on the other hand, are aware that these relationships are one-sided. According to Northwestern University communications professor Dr. S. Venus Jin, social media influencers cultivate “filtered and strategically selected images of their fashion taste,” which portray them in unnatural ways in order to promote their brand. Since consumers perceive the relationship with the celebrity as authentic, however, these edited photos come off as reality, creating a misunderstanding between the celebrity and fan (Jin and Ryu, 2020). Followers believe that the celebrity’s feed is wholly representative of their day-to-day life, when in fact celebrities are curating a marketable persona. Additionally, according to a study by professors Parmar and Mann, in which they examined endorsed products, celebrity image accounts for about 74% of a consumer’s purchase intention, meaning that celebrities must always have “ethical behavior… an attractive appearance, and have a good public image” in order to maintain sales. The high standards that followers set for celebrities, and the personal offense they feel when their expectations don’t pan out, imply that there will always be a divide in which neither side is completely transparent with the other.
Considering that the celebrity and fans don’t actually know each other, it’s also unfair that fans overstep personal boundaries. According to David Oliver, wellness reporter for USA Today and University of Maryland journalism professor, the number of artists being attacked while performing on stage has been steadily rising, because of the “blurring of online and real-life boundaries” that leaves fans “clamoring for viral moments with their favorite artists.” Singer Bebe Rexha was hospitalized after being hit by a phone; similarly, the inside of singer Ava Max’s eye was scratched when she was slapped by an audience member (Oliver, 2023). Many other artists were harmed by having objects hurled at them, due to fans desperately wanting to be noticed by their idols. There have also been incidents in which followers stalked celebrities in order to express their obsessive love. According to New York Post reporters Georgett Roberts and Dean Balsamini, a man named Ashley Arbour, who was charged with two counts of trespassing after searching for Taylor Swift inside her apartment complex, claimed that Swift is “like [him] except she is a woman,” and that “she is truly the only one that understands [him].” While this is an extreme case, it shows that when fans believe their imaginary relationship with the celebrity is actually real, that delusion can result in harm, injury, and fear.
Parasocial relationships are detrimental on both sides, with genuine consequences when fans believe their favorite celebrities owe it to them to expose personal details of their life. Instead, fans should focus more on real-life relationships. By setting time limits on apps such as Instagram and X, where algorithms can be intentionally addictive, more time can be dedicated to hobbies and strengthening connections with friends or family, in order to develop a healthier sense of belonging and acceptance. According to clinical psychologist Dr. Adam Borland, when distancing oneself from a parasocial relationship, it’s important to “allow for the sense of loss,” but also to focus on positives, such as sharing what one has learned from the experience (“Friend or Faux,” 2023). People can learn to embrace a healthy balance of supporting a celebrity without becoming immersed in every aspect of their life. In a world that is growing increasingly more reliant on the internet, it’s important to separate the fact from the fiction, so that people begin to address its seriousness.
References
Chung, S. & Cho, H. (2017). Fostering Parasocial Relationships with Celebrities on Social Media: Implications for Celebrity Endorsement. Wiley Online Library, https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/mar.21001.
Friend or Faux: Are Parasocial Relationships Healthy? (2023). Cleveland Clinic, https://health.clevelandclinic.org/parasocial-relationships.
Hwang, K. & Zhang, Q.(2018). Influence of parasocial relationship between digital celebrities and their followers on followers’ purchase and electronic word-of-mouth intentions, and persuasion knowledge. ScienceDirect, https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0747563218302553.
Jin, S. & Ryu, E. (2020). “I’ll buy what she’s #wearing”: The roles of envy toward and parasocial interaction with influencers in Instagram celebrity-based brand endorsement and social commerce. ScienceDirect, https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0969698918310087.
Oliver, D. (2023). Lil Nas X almost hit by sex toy. Bebe Rexha hit by phone. What concert behavior says about us. USA Today, https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2023/06/30/bebe-rexha-phone-kelsea-ballerini-ava-max-concert-attacks/70370125007/.
Parmar, Y. and Mann, B. (2021). Consumer–Celebrity Parasocial Interaction: A Conditional Process Analysis. SageJournals, https://journals-sagepub-com.ezproxy2.library.drexel.edu/doi/full/10.1177/09721509211010358.
Roberts, G. and Balsamini, D. (2023). Apparent deranged Taylor Swift stalker arrested for entering star’s building speaks out: ‘The only one that understands me.’ New York Post, https://nypost.com/2023/08/19/homeless-man-arrested-for-sneaking-into-taylor-swifts-nyc-pad/.
Saunders, E. (2022). Heartstopper’s Kit Connor says he was ‘forced’ to come out as bisexual. BBC, https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-61067343.